funny the way it is...

As I had a few quiet moments today...i sat thinking & looking back at the last year, and the year before that, and the year before that...WOW....has our life changed!! First to my mind..when I thought about flying somewhere...the farthest I could ever see myself flying was to Florida...why?? Well, because I have traveled there  many times..it wasn't new to me...I trusted that I'd get there fine, and all would be ok!! But you see, no matter where I travel...there's always a chance...a very slim one...that something horrible would happen to me. ...and it doesn't matter where we are or where we travel...God is always there....You know, it's funny how God works...never did I imagine God would send me halfway across the world...You see, that was one of my deepest fears...flying!! And he had it all planned out...At the beginning of the process...I honestly thought...oh.my.goodness...how will I ever make it there...I had heard from so many other families traveling before us...how wonderful their experience was, how beautiful Africa & it's people were...and how precious our sons were..but, somewhere inside me..It felt so out of reach...It seriously felt like I would never get there....and now I know why...because, until you experience it first-hand..one would truly never be able to fully understand how right they all were!! Not only has this been a journey to get our sons & brothers...it's also been a journey in my walk with God...I have never felt so much comfort, peace, & contentment as I do now. Don't let the fears of your heart control you, determine where you go, or stop you from doing something that you so strongly desire...A few years ago, I was diagnosed with M.S...and most of the comments I would get about our family adopting was..."How can you do that?" or, "Won't that be hard on your health?" I tell you what friends...you know whats hard on your health...FEAR!! And HOW COULD I NOT??? I wasn't given a death sentence...hmmm....let me think...be a family to children who are without...or be afraid that maybe someday my MS will get worse...I CHOOSE TO BE THAT FAMILY!! What is fear holding you from??  
   2 Timothy1:7 For God has not given you us a spirit of fear, but of power & of love & of a sound mind.

 Joshua 1:9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and of good courage. Do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.
                                                       xo kristen

I LOVE MY SISTER...BY GRANT

  I LOVE MY SISTER BECAUSE SHE IS SWEET AND NICE AND KIND AND LOVING... I LOVE YOU KATE, LOVE GRANT
             p.s. Yep, this was written by Grant...as I was cleaning up the kitchen tonight, he showed me what he made for his sweet sister, and asked me if he could write about her on our blog...and he wrote it all by himself!! Thank God for sweet siblings!!! xo kristen

jibber-jabber....

                      zonked out in the kitchen...she's my lil shadow...

              my silly "littlest"...Tesfa

                  Ageze & Grant...aka...the airbenders/ninja's!!

                  ninjas in the night....

                   loves his flashlight...oh, and gotta love the frog boots!!!

            Grant being a spy!!   So long mommas plants..Ageze got the best of them...

Well, both Grant & Kate had their conferences on thurs pm...and you guessed it...they both had fantastic reports!! They are both really excelling in the reading department.it's amazing how once they get it...they truly just take off with it...they are crazy fast little readers!! I have to remind my sweet Kate...singing her way thru books sounds lovely..but probably not great for the comprehension..ha!! Or maybe it is?? Friday, Kate ended up being sick..not too much fun on her day off..& Grant ended up spending the afternoon & evening with nana & bompa...the little ones napped, Kate & I napped..and the house... for a few moments...was QUIET!! That surely doesn't happen too often!! And guess who's celebrating their 4 1/2 half birthday this coming week?? That would be our sweet little guy..Ageze!! You see, his birthday isn't till May 20th...so we thought it would be nice to celebrate a half b-day for him..and thats this November 20th!! He has witnessed many birthdays since coming home...he dreams of having a candle to blow out...and just a cake!! I asked him if he wanted me to make any fave Ethiopian foods..and he said..."no momma...cake, ice cream..no Ethiopian food!!" So, Cake & ice cream it will be!! He has requested an "Ashenafi "cake...Ashenafi was a little friend who was in the same orphanage...now he lives with his family in AZ...but Ashenafi had a woody doll(Toy Story!!)so..I guess that means he'll be having a TOY STORY themed party!! Well, thats most of the weekend happenings at the "casa de gilliss"....maybe a few christmas light's being put up today...kate still recuperating...and we'll top it off with a dinner at nana & bomps!! Enjoy a few random pics from our wknd:)
xo kristen

THIS IS IT...

So...I know I've mentioned this many times before...but, since returning from Ethiopia...I can't shake this overwhelming feeling( a good overwhelming!!) that my heart feels...I LONG to do more...I LONG to make an impact...And guess what....I found what my heart has been looking for...ONE CHILD CAMPAIGN!! I've heard of this organization in the past few months, checked their blog here & there, been inspired, and up until today felt that..here I have this strong desire to HELP, Make a difference in a child's life...and each & every organization I have been emailing or contacting...seemed they needed no help...or should I say...MY HELP!! So, I've continued to search..not only on the internet,FB, and all that...but my heart!! I emailed the founder of One Child Campaign...he promptly emailed back and left me his number...so..I stepped out of my comfort zone...and called him!! I had one of the nicest conversations I've had in a long time...He GETS IT!! He LOVES ETHIOPIA & it's People...and he's doing something about it...and I plan on making a difference...not only for this great organization..but for Ethiopia!!! So, thank you Caleb for taking time out of your busy day, and visiting with me!! So, go ahead...check out this super fantastic organization.........

                                       http://www.onechildcampaign.com/ !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

are you my 25,000th visitor???

Okay...so to all of you faithful leapoflove visitors...whoever is my 25,000th hit will receive this yummy treat!!So, when you visit my blog..scroll to the bottom, and if you are that ONE lucky 25,000th visitor...leave me a comment, your name,address etc...and the goodness will be on it's way! ( sorry, the kiddos aren't included!!)
   And if you want to learn more about this coffee, the mission & the fundraising possibilities...check out
http://www.963missions.com/ We sold this yummy stuff  before & during our adoption process, and we found it to be a great fundraiser!!!     xo kristen

processing...

Each day that goes by, we are hearing more & more details coming from our little guys. This morning they chatted away..about 1 1/2 hrs to be exact..my, oh my...did they have details..We heard about the lions at Ageze's door..."lion's eat my food, mama!" "good morning( he means the next morning..)Ageze food all gone...naughty lion!!" "Lions big momma, and noisy!" Tesfa follows it up with..."Momma, hyena bite..scare me!" He then proceeded to tell Ageze & I that a hyena bit him...this momma doubts that...but who knows!! Last evening, I had gone outside quick...and told the kiddos to stay in...but Not Our Tesfa...all of a sudden I hear a very loud scream...our next door neighbors have a small dog and he could hear it barking(he dislikes small dogs in a very bad way!!)...He was yelling louder than the dog was barking!! I quickly ran to him..told him the dog was on a leash, and went inside..reassured him over & over that he was ok..the dog would not bite him..etc..and Ageze said..."stop,Tesfa" I said.."Oh my goodness Tesfa...you dont need to scream your head off..my goodness we are inside now..it's ok..relax!! WRONG THING TO SAY...I guess I have never thought about that phrase before..(Don't scream your head off!!) Tesfa in the most terrified voice said..."No, thank you momma...no head off..Tesfa nap..shaking his finger...No head off momma!" OH.MY.WORD...At this time I was boiling water for spaghetti..and he pointed towards the stove and said..."no more momma..doro..head off!( Doro means chicken!!) Once again, I told him...Tesfa ...momma loves you, you are ok..Tesfa, we dont cut heads off here( all awhile I can't believe that I am having this conversation!!)So, I sure wish that the lions were their only little worry...not so....Ageze clearly remembers his brothers, little sister, papa and stepmom...he talks about them like it was yesterday. He asked me this morning.."Momma..Ageze go with you Ethiopia sometime?" I said..."well, of course...momma & papa love Ethiopia, and hope to take all 4 of you back someday soon"....but how soon is too soon??? He very vividly told me of the day he left his home in ET...for good. He said.." Momma, Ageze cry big, & Taya(sp?) & Atamo(sp?)(brothers) cry big momma...Ageze go to Sister(Sister Almaz at the care center)..."Alto(his stepmom) say momma...come back again?" "no thank you"..replied Ageze.."Ageze happy america momma!" My eyes welled up with tears...I reassured him how much he is loved...by us, and by his Ethiopian family...and he was onto the lions once again. So...I tell you this because...His hurt is real..his love for his ET family still remains...and I try so hard to tell myself that he is so much better here...but, the fact is...a part of his heart is missing...What did he feel that day when he was taken from his home to the unknown?? And I look back to the first few weeks of being home, and get angry at myself for having less patience in those trying days...I will never forget those hours of him wimpering unconsolably...or him thrashing his body against mine...and I remember at the time it frustrated me...How dare I?? So, with that...I say...I'd do it all over again!! The risk is worth it!! Ageze & Tesfa...you are worth it!! You are Loved!!
                                                          xo kristen

4 months ago today....

 I was a complete mess...Kasey & I were starting our travels to pick up our sons...and boy did I look like a crazy lady!!i mentioned the other day..I wish I could see the video surveillance from the Bismarck Airport, I'm sure a few people had some very good laughs!! I also wish I could re-do that day..I was so terrified of leaving 2 of our children here at home, and also sooo terrified that for hours...I would be in a plane for hours above the ocean..2 children here in North Dakota & 2 in Africa...knowing if they needed me...I could do nothing! Looking back at that day, I wish I would've relaxed..bottom line!! We were all ok...we were all in the hands of God...and isn't that the best place to be!! So, there you have it...I was fearful!! Fearful that my plane would go down...what??I knew that God did not take me on this journey to go down in my plane..plain & simple!! Fearful that Grant & Kate would feel jealous, replaced..while they stayed here in Bismarck... skyping with me over the computer, seeing Kasey & I with Ageze & Tesfa...It Broke this momma's heart...I ended up crying every time I talked to them...My family was not all together & I did not like it one bit!! But...4 months ago today...I also began a journey that would leave me feeling...BLESSED BEYOND MY WILDEST DREAMS....And I'm so very thankful that God put my heart at peace..(well, once we were in MPLS,that is!!) and I have never felt so close to my God, as I did when we were flying through the sun-lit sky, looking out of the plane's window..seeing the Mediterranean Sea...Seeing the Northern outline of Africa...knowing that God was with me...even though I was so far away from so many people I loved...HE was STiLL there.... and always will be!! ( I was listening to Here I am to worship...I probably shouldve apologized for my terrible singing voice...I'm sure every one next to me heard me singing...ha!!) Don't ever underestimate the love God has for you...my God is so big, so strong & so mighty..there's nothing my God cannot do. Lord, I am so thankful that even in the times I am fearful, nervous, doubtful...that YOU are still there...and I am so very thankful that you took the fear away from me that July day...I cannot imagine if I would have missed out on such a life-changing opportunity..and I'm forever thankful that you entrusted our family with two of your most precious children!!

                                                               xo kristen