deep...

OUR AGEZE...Let me tell you, the moment I saw his sweet face...I was in love, and there was something about his pictures that captured my whole heart...He is so very sweet, tender, kind, loving, helpful..etc. Yesterday, I took Ageze & Tesfa to the doctor to start their immunizations...not fun!! My mom was brave enough to come with me...whole purpose there, was so she could be in the waiting room with one while the other was being seen...& so on. Well, I thought it was best to have Ageze start...so, upon entering the room..he said.."Momma, what doin??" I thought, "Do I tell him??" Well, I really didn't need to I guess, because you see, he's so smart, he said" Momma, shot today??" Well, I couldnt then lie, so I said "Yes, you are honey, and it might hurt just a tiny bit, and then you'll be all done." Momma Loves you Ageze!! WHAT??...good one on my part!! I'm sure he thought..."right, you must really love me, you are letting me get shots..." Anywho...the nurses(yes, 4 of them!) came in..each gave him 1 shot, and he started to wail...NO ETHIOPIA, MOMMA!! Hurt my heart..I mean, I guess I couldve waited longer, but with the winter bugs coming, I thought, well, we might as well get goin.... The only thing I can think of is....he had bloodwork done before coming to the U.S....he was probably terrified of going back. Anyhow, the difference between both of the little guys was huge...Tesfa whines a minute, was handed a treat and forgot all about it...Not Ageze!! I think part of him was embarrassed, terrified, scared..etc. So, I cuddled with him alot after that...tried to explain the best I could as to why we get shots, reassured him again, again, & again that I loved him, and he was not going back to ET. We came home, and he went directly to the computer..I followed, and he said.."momma, ethiopia photos??" So, I asked him if he wanted to look at the pics from ET. He said yes. So we spent a little more than an hour & he went through each & every picture of while he & Tesfa lived together in the orphanage...explained in detail...like crazy, amazing, details...details that only he could educate me on. And so, Grant, Kate, Tesfa & I listened to him spill his heart over each one, told us that he hid his treats & toys we sent him under his bed, a little girl bit his bracelet we sent him, and he said.."momma, Ageze cried & cried..BIG cry, momma, and Sister said,"no, no, bite Ageze bracelet, (little girls name)" He said, " Momma, Ageze & Tesfa cry big...momma where are you??" Oh man...make a mom wanna bawl for hours. Kate then ran upstairs & grabbed his broken bracelet, and Ageze smiled ear to ear..."Momma, fix it??" Of course, I'll fix it!! So, he now wants to go back & retrieve all of his items he left behind...his little puppy, photos, and letters we sent him...yep, that's our Ageze...he's a thinker & a dreamer!! So, each day that goes by, they are both healing more & more...we are putting together all of the pieces of this enormously large puzzle...and what a privilege it is to be their family, to love, hold, nurture & listen to them while their little hearts ache...a little less each day. Lord, I pray that you continue to heal Ageze & Tesfa's emotional scars. I pray that with each day that passes, that the fear of returning to ET will become less & less. Thank you Lord for bringing them into our lives...we are forever changed.  ( the pic above was taken about 1 month before bringing them home....see what I mean...he's our little thinker!!)    xo kristen